Initial situation
I (42) have been addicted for about 25 years. My drugs were always downers, mainly opiates. Countless detoxifications and therapies simply had no success with me. After such a long addiction, the drugs took a bigger and bigger part of my life. In this, for me largely perspective-less situation, I read about Ibogaine. I found the best German-language information in a forum. And above all I found a tripsitter who was willing to help me as a tripsitter.
The Trip
On 08.07.2007 it was then so far. My condition was not good. I was on Turkey and had not been able to eat for 24 hours and was afraid. My Tripsitter gave me first 1 capsule with 100 mg Ibogain as allergy test and then in the course of 1 hour again 4 capsules a.200mg. After that I felt a strong need to lie down. I then experienced the visions in 3 phases. In the first phase I experienced a gigantic flood of images that ran like a slide show before my eyes. I saw 6 pictures at a time in a horizontal row in front of my closed eyes. The images lit up briefly and then alternated with a new series of images every tenth of a second. Some of the pictures were familiar to me, friends, scenes from my life etc., with others I knew nothing at all. Despite the rapid changes, I had the feeling that I was perceiving and taking in all the images. In general, the images were of an impressive intensity and clarity.
In the second phase, I experienced my body from the outside. I saw myself lying in a kind of transparent CT tube, with my body being disassembled on a molecular level, defective molecules replaced and then reassembled. Pretty crazy, but very impressive and absolutely no bad feelings. Somehow it was clear to me that this was something good.
The third phase consisted of short dream-like visions in which I saw episodes from my life. Partially I can also remember short visions that showed me in the future (+10J). Overall, these visions were not as clear and intense as the two previous phases.
Between the phases I was always briefly awake. During these times, my tripsitter gave me a total of another 700 mg of ibogaine. So my total dose was 1.6 g of ibogaine which is about 20 mg/kg.
After about 12 hours, the vision phase was over and I was exhausted and had almost no condition left. Even the 10 m to the toilet was a feat of strength. All in all, I was in a state that is difficult to describe. I was physically exhausted, but no longer energetic and somehow very thoughtful. I spent the next 24 hours lying down and thinking about my life and everything. I drank a lot to eliminate the ibogaine. In between I had some vision-like dreams every now and then. As the rest of the ibogaine left my body I felt that something had changed and I became really euphoric. I also felt energetic and full of drive and ideas. Unfortunately, this did not correspond to my actual physical condition, which was quite modest. It took me about 1 week until I was able to go through an 8h working day again. My full condition I had reached only after approx. 4 weeks again.
All in all I found the Ibogaine trip very pleasant and fascinating. The only downer was the lack of condition afterwards.
The time after
The most significant thing for me is that since then I feel no craving for any substances at all.In fact, in the last few weeks I have gotten my hands on some substances that I would not have been able to resist in the past, but I was no more interested in them than I was in aspirin.Unbelievable!In general, many things in my life have come back on track.I came to many important insights and at the same time developed a positive view of myself and the world.Through the positive attitude many things succeed as if by themselves.I have always been a very restless type (ADD?).Since the Ibo-Trip I have much more inner peace and can now finally understand what it means to "rest in yourself".Another amazing change is that an insect phobia, which was based on a childhood trauma, has simply disappeared.
I only knew the feeling of being clean and did not know that it is a completely different feeling to be really free!I would really like to go to an NA meeting and say. My name is Markus and I used to be an addict, but I'm not anymore.Then they fall off their chairs!Further considerations
Ibogaine is the most amazing substance I have ever encountered.